Dallas, A Journal
by Skuzes
Summary: A short journal that Dallas may have kept. What are his thoughts on Johnny? 3 parts, tragedy after first part, slash mildly implied later.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: In 9th grade we were given a final project after reading The Outsiders, and part of it was to write three 'journal entries' from the point of view of one character. I chose Dallas. This is the first entry and I may post the other two later. Also, this was not intentional, but I guess these (especially the third entry) are a bit slashy but they don't have to be read that way. I hope you enjoy reading this, please read and review!

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I never thought that little Johnnycake could mouth off to anyone—especially me. He's so damn quiet. I guess he's just afraid to say anything…which is stupid. We'd listen to him if he'd just open his frigging mouth once in a while.

It got worse after what the Socs did to him. The bastards…I've never seen anyone beaten so badly. Don't think even _I _could ever do that to someone…even a Soc.

Except for the Socs that beat Johnny. I could care less about what happened to them. When I saw Johnny…all I wanted to do was find who did that to him and beat them into a bloody pulp. I don't think I've ever been that angry.

I didn't think he'd ever quite get over it…but I guess him mouthing off to me is a good sign. Not that I want him telling me what to do. **Nobody** tells me what to do. But I'm glad he's actually speaking up for once. I haven't heard him say much of anything in a long time.

Dammit…I guess I have to go down to that party now. Not looking forward to it…can't stop thinking about that Cherry Valance. She was a real looker. She hates me, but…something about the way she insulted me…Yeah, there's definitely something there. Guess I'll have to work on her some more...


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I meant to post the second part sooner but uh. I totally forgot about it. Sorry, my bad!  
Yeah, with Dallas's swearing, since it was for school I obviously couldn't put that in...but in the next and last part I have a censored word that I will uncensor.  
All that being said, here is part 2. I know it's very short but I hope you enjoy!

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Now I _really_ didn't think he had it in him. The others maybe, and maybe even Ponyboy in a bad spot…but little Johnnycake? I never thought he would actually be able to kill someone.

I'm proud of him…sort of. I'm glad he had the guts and all, but…it was Johnny. Johnny wouldn't hurt a fly.

I'm kind of happy, though. It sounded like one of the ones that beat Johnny before. I just wish I would've been there to do it myself.

But now, he and Ponyboy are running. I don't know why Ponyboy is going with Johnny, but I helped them both out anyway. Told 'em what they should do.

I don't know if they'll be okay, though. Pony doesn't always use his head, and Johnny's never been on his own before. He's with Ponyboy, but they're both young, and not used to this kind of thing. And even though I am, something makes me hope that they never **do** get used to it.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: So I totally forgot to update this story. Yay me! Oy. Sorry for anyone who was actually interested in this story. School is killing me. Anyway, this is the last part of the character journal I wrote. I kept the censored swear word from when I submitted it in class. Also, you can see in this last part how there is a stronger feeling of slashiness but you don't have to see it that way.

The Outsiders Character Journal III—Dallas

How could this happen?

How could he be so f-- stupid?

This…can't be real. He was doing so good…

How could Johnny be dead?

Why did he have to help those kids? I told him not to. I told him it was stupid, pointless.

But I didn't try…didn't try hard enough to stop him.

And now he's dead. My Johnny…is dead.

I know he worshipped me. I know he _loved_ me.

But did he know that I loved him?

I never told him how much I cared…how much he meant to me…he was the one good thing in my life, and now he's gone.

I don't think I can live without him. …No, I **know** I can't. So how am I supposed to? How am I supposed to even try?

…I can't stay here. I have to do _something_…it doesn't matter. I don't **care.** …But I can't stay here.

…Johnny is dead…

And it's all my fault.

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A/N: Review please and thanks? Tell me what you think of my two year old writing! Hah


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